problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
i've never seen someone fall down the steps so gracefully... i think im in love
The handjob she gave me was better than the best blowjob I've ever gotten.. Just imagine the possibilities.
I feel like a great embryo-shaped weight has been lifted off my shoulders.
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I don't know if it's the amount i drank last night or the number of taylor swift statuses on facebook but i feel like puking everywhere
E drugging s springing. Ease dnt Kate. To t e. ess e I meant thou.
My whole sorority girl exterior is just a lie. I'm a fat tumblr girl on the inside.
When i like your selfie it means one of two things. 1. thats a nice photo, friend. OR 2. I wanna bend you over a table. But youll never know.
My one night stand said I love you, opened my fridge, stole my cream cheese and left.
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I think I just pulled an onion peel off my boob from sleeping on their kitchen floor
My body hates me. Pretty sure I drank 3 pitches full of coffee last night and took two adderal. I slept and ran a marathon at the same time. You should see my bed.
Just found the measuring tape in my bathroom. How drunk could I have possibly been on Saturday?!
sending my old camp counselor nudes. childhood memory win or new low?
Just as an add on, don't expect me to wear matching bra and underwear. If I do, I'm probably drunk and it's your fucking birthday. Have a great night.
Oh well, he'll live. He has a hand and a penis.
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