ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
I'm starting therapy this week.. Taylor Swift music isn't cutting it for me anymore
If u were an xman, what would ur power be? I would shoot lasers from my boobs.
i walked outside and you were driving up the stairs to her apartment
Your doorknob is in my back seat, in case you were looking for it.
Okay good. I don't want another mom thinking I got their daughter pregnant.
The night went downhill when he lit her purse on fire and tried putting it out with vodka
I have vodka soaked strawberries. My latest tarot card reading hinted at a lesbian/bisexual coming out. I doubt I survive the night.
I need an adult. someone more adult than my current state
Blood work from physical was all good, apparently heavy alcohol use agrees with me
I just had a twenty minute discussion about endangered breed dog breeding with an Extremely drunk guy
So many questions...
They asked me my level of pain at the hospital and I told them I called my ex 6 times
Nice. I like it when Maker's Mark makes decisions for you.
I have 3 bottles of vodka in my room telling me not to go to work tomorrow.
I don't think it's a coincidence that the day I just happen to do the splits at the gym I come back with 7 guys' phone numbers.
Randomize
