how can i change my meal plan to a keystone plan?
it was great that she threw up because that made me the only one trying to hook up with her
no you cant smoke seaweed
we're at Rob's house and just invented the best drinking game ever....we are on Chatroulette and everytime we see a dick we all have to drink.
I went to go pee and found a strand of your hair wrapped around my penis.
its totally unfair that im just as ill-prepared as a 16 year old but there's no tv show for 25 and pregnant.
The stripper on stage Is eating a mozzarella stick while on the pole....that's a new level of I don't give a fuck
one of the service guys here said i licked ranch off your face lastnight
Sometimes one must go to great lengths and make great sacrifices to get drunk. I willingly accept the challenge.
Now I know he's not trying to fuck me. He took me to lunch at White Castle.
Whatever, consider condoms an eighteen year investment.
I could probably save all of the money I would have spent on condoms and put a kid through college.
I just want it to be said that I had sex in my Belle dress last night. Classy motherfucker.
Fuck it. I'm going for it. You're only young once, right?
You've been saying that for 5 years now. Let me know when the novelty wears off.
You thought the flashing lights were strobe lights when they were loading you into the ambulance. You asked the EMT if he had any X.
I have peed in a lot of sinks
Randomize
