erin looks like she hung out with the sham wow guy last night. she's got the beat up hooker look goin' on
I just found out I have a small penis.
Couldn't you tell by how you've NEVER had a girlfriend?
you guys are cousins why the FUCK are your pants off
we are learning about oedipus in english. fuck you for making this awkward for me
You said you didn't deserve to walk so you started crawling down to your room
I told him we can only be friends from now on & he said he knows but that I'm the 'best he ever had'.
you slept with him again didn't you
you can't just quote Drake AND compliment me at the same time & receive nothin. he knows me too well
To justify your stumbling you just kept yelling 'it's the boat, not the drinks' We hadn't even left the dock yet....
He still lectured me about forgetting shit. Than he said he's gonna paint me green so I can stand in a corner and be a plant.
She basically needs a man who will never act up and take all of her shit
I'm even having trouble finding a guy who's taller than me with no unibrow.. someone needs to tell her its time to lower her standards
It's a little weird that I'm blowing my wingman.
I'll be the Broncos and you be the Seahawks and you can pound the shit out of me.
Using my graduation announcement box as a table to roll a blunt on. I've official stopped giving a shit about senior year
This place is full of unfortunate mustaches.
I'm about to go get lunchables and alcohol. Take that adulthood
dont know what thebfuxk is in rhat shit, but dont lemme have antmore
Randomize
