I legitimately sent him a storybook of naked pictures.
She thought someone was breaking in but when I said it was me she got even angrier and threw a coffee mug at my head.
I'm a little upset you wasted 3 beers on your wet tee shirt contest.
i don't know what happened by from the looks of her lipstick I'd say she was skull fucked by a rhino
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he called us the olsen twins. we also rapped ignition much to his dismay.
I woke up in an empty bathtub with the wrong brother
Also they do not have any come back to america, i miss my fuck buddy cards at Hallmark.
I think my body is literally trying to get me to reproduce. "fuck someone! Anyone!" - my body
I'm on a treadmill at the gym ordering pizza on my phone so it'll get to my house around the time I get home. I NEED HELP. Or I'm a genius. I haven't decided.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Shame?!? Shame only comes from getting naked in front of strangers and it not being awesome
it'll be okay! And just think of this ultrasound as the most action you've had in a month...
I just had to go dumpster diving, at 3am, in the rain, because I realized that I somehow threw away the brand new package of birth control pills I picked up from the pharmacy this afternoon. So I'm sort of a responsible adult.
Yes dating, but it seems easier to just live in a perpetual state of Netflix, internet porn, and cheese.
I don't think you could pull off being mean.
How do you think I'm still single?
You wouldn't eat with utensils. You insisted on making your own spoon out of a bendy straw and staples while singing "I'm a survivor" by Destiny's Child.
Randomize