i just walked with a girl who was carrying a chair down the street. apparently she got mad at the bartender and took the bar stool when she left.
all ill say about last night is that we tried to stop you. oh and the bus you're on is going to nashville.
I need to talk about my life with someone. Preferably with someone who hasn't tried to jizz on me
Whats the count minus fat chicks?
Sunday was the 8 month anniversary when you shot me in the face...just an FYI.
mom just asked if we are going to need more kaluha as she pulls 5 out of the cupboard. this xmas might kill me
come to Starbucks. I'm the fat girl eating a whole pizza sitting on the ground
As shirtless as possible
I wonder if they have a "21st birthday" section in the hospital..
I'm cool with a hey old buddy how have you been want to fuck me in the butt kind of thing
Literally just one second of unclenched butt hole away from shitting my pants.
Nahh no judgin. Compliments to the balls are always heartfelt
Then you're three pancakes deep in regret.
NO FUCKBOY SHALL PASS OPERATION #BITCHMODE HAS SUCCEEDED
Why can I remember how tall Nicki Minaj is from looking up her height once months ago, yet after weeks into the semester I can't even remember where any my classrooms are located
Importance
Randomize
