ARI BLEW A 2.0 HAHAHAHAHAHHAHH THESE COPS ARE SO COOL!!!!
im so horny i just used my electric toothbrush to masturbate. god help me
We are like the golden girls with less cheesecake and more drugs.
Hey they cleaned all the blood out of the elevator. Also could you pick up some nachos?
when i got there he was on top of an air mattress in the middle of the pool with a bag of doritos and a 40 telling people he needed his space.
i just unblacked out cuddled in a pita pit booth with ten dollars rubberbanded to my hand.
Somebody left a mini pitcher in the bathroom. Think its safe?
After i black out, be a good friend and point me to the direction of a girl with daddy issues, any girl would do just fine
What do you wear to apply at a strip club?
I don't know what was up he just kept sitting in his chair smoking weed and watching home movies all night it was weird as fuck.
how many people can say they bit their tattoo off?
fuck you and your stupid hot as hell face
I told him I was on my period but he says "I'm a doctor, you think I can't handle blood?" And just went for it. Jackpot
well, shes hot as hell, but she does keep saying she's the president of the loch ness monster's fan club, so that's kinda a red flag...
I'm going to start talking to Bill again, he has friends with boats which means we'll get to go on boats.
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