Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
I have no morals, kinda like you have no standards
None
making your facebook status TEQUILA is like basically saying "im easy tonight. feel free to take advantage"
Just coerced a Santa to buy me a handle. Tis the season.
i have to go- we're throwing the dummy from the balcony again
We sold so many girl scout cookies when we were little. What went wrong?
Just picture a bunch of Abraham Lincolns having an orgy.
laying on floor next to bathroom with vent on to give myself comfort and remind me that im not going deaf. what did i smoke?
Apparently getting a blow job in the mens room from the bar owners daughter will get you kicked out.
you haven't really lived until you are in a situation where your vagina is hanging out
I was afraid someone would drug test my pants so you set them on fire.
There's a lady lying down on the sidewalk in front of our building smoking a cig
My lunch = taste testing salsas for A&P. They gave me a free 64oz grape juice as a thank you. So, now we have something to drink in the house. So while you are spending all the money on breakfast rolls and pizza for lunch, I'm cigaretteless and whoring myself for tablespoons of salsa and free juice.
You're like the fucking Mozart of sexting.
You left your phone here
Wait...
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