i walked into his room and he was eskimo kissing his weed..
The worst part is I think my tongue cut his penis and now he wont talk to me.
They live so far away from me that not fucking them both would have been financially irresponsible
I tried to fuck this guy who I'm pretty sure has an erectile dysfunction
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Tonight's trip to the ER was brought to you by, "fork jousting."
well the blowjob for study guide exchange was a success.
I told you, we're just gonna get ripped and light sparklers
THE VODKA TRAIN IS NOW PULLING INTO THE STATION
One last thing: he lists glow sticks and tacos as things he can't live without. How would we not be friends??
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you flipped over the sheets and there was my bed. filled with ding dongs.
I need a "no soliciting" sign for your dick
What even was the context for that. All I have written down is "I would vote for President SnakeJaw."
My Easter Basket from my parents consisted of one chocolate bunny and a massive amount of condoms and a single note saying "the pope approves of the use of condoms" love mom and dad
Ate 3 ghost peppers and chased them with Everclear last night. Currently on the toilet cursing the universe and everyone in it.
I made soup. Now I'm having post soup making wine. I had pre soup making wine also.
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