imagine if the morning after your status automatically updated with the name of the person you hooked up with
Just witnessed a fat girl fall off the treadmill, pop a medicine ball, and drink coke out of a water bottle all in one workout.
the cop cuffed us all with 40's still taped to our hands
Im tired as fuck but i cant leave him here like this i gave him the acid and i feel the responsibillity to put his mind back together its fun im an architect about to about to construct a whole new belief and moral system inside this soul. Talk about the best psychothearpy
I fail to see the problem of enjoying a glass of wine while I poop...
the point I'm tryimg to make is that you didn't need to take the whole box in with you
It would seem she's painting a bullseye right in between her legs
i'm face down in a ditch right now please help this is not a metaphor for my life this is real.
If you walk into a place and someone says "happy birthday" while handing you a shot. You. Take. It.
Yeah, I got home from work at like 9:30, and he was passed out on the couch wearing only a tee shirt and The Jurassic Park theme on repeat.
I don't care how hot she was, she wouldn't stop singing "Shut Up and Dance", instant boner-killer.
I kept telling you not to give them blowjobs, but you kept screaming back, "it's okay, we're friends on facebook!"
i woke up this morning wearing my pants as a scarf and my shirt as a daiper, my boyfriends contact name in my phone is "human sacrifice" and yours is "i like eggs"....can someone please tell me what happened last night
That girl is like a master class on how to be an unlovable crazy person.
I just bumped into this random I hooked up with a few years ago at Steve's party. Talk about a fingerblast from the past!
Not sure she's stomping around my apartment muttering incoherently about wanting to speak to the colonel
Randomize