i had a dream the other night i was titty fucking you while you were asleep, then you woke up and didn't care.
I realize now. I should have just made out with everyone and anyone when I had the chance.
I'm blazed at jack in the box and my order number is 420. I wish everything in the world made this much sense.
In mid-threesome, need more condoms. Wearing a sheet to the gas station. I'll keep you posted
it is a toga and you are a goddess.
Just used my boobs as a ramp to guide ramen into my mouth.
My lower body still feels like its been through a garbage disposal and a trash compactor. In that order.
i have a feeling i am the only one who can successfully pull off the "slutty kentucky derby" look.
All of the texts in my phone just say "BEER". I woke up with glowsticks on my arm. What happened last night?
Holy crap, church bells in Cibolo just scared the hell out of me. I'm pretty sure they were yelling sinner at me.
Well I was kicked out of the bar and woke up on a picnic table. I'd say the night was awesome!
And I'm glad you're waiting to invite him over. he may have a weird penis thing and then dinner becomes awkward.
Your life has no conflict it's just a blur of sex and Netflix
STOP SENDING ME NAKED PICTURES WHEN I'M TRYING TO TEACH. MONDAY TUESDAY 1-3 IS A DICK AND ARSE FREE ZONE
We power houred with shots of red wine. Somehow we ended up with 7 bottles and lost Chris. Trying to find him this hungover is proving very unsuccessful.
That man fucks like a champ. The sex was so good I did him again in the morning just to be sure
Randomize
