new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
Do you think when graham bell invented the phone he ever thought that people would be using them to facebook on the shitter?
I will give everyone a free pointer today. Here it goes, always pee by the house late at night to avoid getting shot by drunk bastards with guns. Never go by the tree line.
you were smoking 3 cigarettes at once saying 'cancer isn't real! Its all in your head!'
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
To the person who left a cup of vomit in the bathroom: I commend you for your aim but you are dead to me- not an ideal birthday present.
So I'm at the VFW tonight and the shot special here is straight 151 for 2 dollars. They must hate our livers
No no no no no no.... That's my emergency bottle for when I realize I've hit rock bottom
when I came to get Jamie there was a cop standing outside with her, made me roll down my window to tell me "she's got to go cause she won't keep her shirt buttoned"
Just found a pack of birth control on the corner of Oakland and Thomas, so if your desperate its up for grabs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Turns out the average person our age has never run from the cops. Life: we're doing it right.
Ran out of plates, so I'm using my sociology notes. Looks like they will finally have a practical use.
Guy running next to me at the gym is judging me. I think he can smell the whiskey leaking out of my pores.
We found him sitting in the back of the club crying into a strippers lap. She told us he missed his pet frog and to come back later.
Dude. I’m playing chess through iMessage with a stripper. What has my life become.
I dont think the chain smoking, tequila shots or cocaine was good for my bronchitis.
Randomize