i think he might wanna be bffs again, but idk cause we're friends again but we haven't been bff since like a year. i don't know what to think...
wow. what a nail bitter. i need popcorn for this. brb
We've got 2 weeks of college left-I want to feel like Gary Busey by graduation.
Using that mug my little cousin painted for me as an ashtray for my weed...at least next time he asks me if I'm using it I can say yes
Yeaaah. I'm kinda wary about that guy. Does he still have that taser that he found on the train?
I hereby state that I am over the age of 18. If I am not of age to purchase or consume alcohol products, I hereby acknowledge that I have not received any alcohol products from said party host. Also, in the event of injury or death, said party host is not to be held accountable. Please reply with your full name and today's date for your e-signature". *note: no text, no entry.*
Sorry bro, just a precaution. You know, ever since the "Jake incident". What a douche.
Evidently I told a girl she should leave the bar because no one wanted to fuck her.
Her life is filled with shit luck. Its like mother nature is having her period and just taking it out on her specifically.
I gave up. I'm crying over my notes. Oh, ya know, just another drunk finals week
Using Michelob Ultra as champagne.
You pole danced in your parka.
I thought the Bane mask would really repel dudes but instead I ended up grinding on a frat dude that whispered "bad bitch contest, you in first place" in my ear in a Batman voice
I just set up a proportion to calculate how much Jolly Rancher vodka I can make with the limited amount of Jolly Ranchers I have. Finally, real-life application of math.
Goodnight Shia. Goodnight Moon.
Yea. You locked yourself outside naked with nothing but running shoes and claimed it was a "parent trap thing."
When I planned out my evening, "co-author lesbian vampire erotica" was not anywhere on my list of expected activities.
Me neither, but hey, this is where we've ended up. Let's embrace the moment.
Randomize
