just took a shot of grandma at the fucking bowling alley... this is going to be interesting
Who's your beautiful friend? Please include the words "Straight", "Single", and "Legal" in your response.
I'm going to an arts college, I live next to the frat houses, and my room number is 420. god has plans for me and I couldn't be happier.
I was high enough to understand and function with 'flip' while playing brick breaker
Damn. I don't think I could ever be that high.
Ya I guess he's not a bad roommate. I mean if he wasn't here I would probably be more lazy and pee in bottles and stuff.
Monday morning margarita madness at ny house. Yes before wheel of fortune. Yes day drinking.
Brandon's Recipe: two parts cocoa, one part sugar, one part milk, two parts four, 378 parts paranoia. Thanks for the fucking brownies, bitch.
At least I got to make out with you a little before you proposed.
IM TRYING TO BE RESPONSIBLE AND ALL I WANT TO DO IS FUNNEL CHEAP BEER AND SCREAM ABOUT HOW MUCH I LOVE OUR NATION
In other news it turns out I like Heineken.. In a desert island kind of way
There is a car windscreen wiper in my handbag... Not my car's, not ok.
he's the only real guy friend I've had who I've never made out with
He fed me Girl Scout cookies while I was still tied up...what did I do right?
according to the calendar even that i put in my phone last night, i'm supposed to fuck shit up at 11am today... i really hope i didn't miss something important
its a comptetion of fuckups and im HERE TO WIN
Randomize
