Dogs love guiness but it fucks up their kidneys
Can't remember why I called but it definitely had something to do with Lou Bega
I guess there's some 16 and under softball tournament and they all are at my work. what is a 21 year old to do?
The responsible thing...show them the break room.
honestly, magaritas are the void men can't fill.
All four of us managed to throw up in the same bathroom at different times during the night. I think we'll get along great living together.
He kept calling my vagina a magic clam, and it was speaking to him, telling him to feed it his penis. I played along.
Oh god he's like Julia Roberts in pretty woman... And I'm the one who's gotta make a lady out of him.
Bartender just fed me brownie. Its going to be a good night
I woke up with a black eye, bruised knuckles, wearing women's clothing, in a house I did not recognize, next to a solid 9. Thank you for making 21 special.
I paused mid sex to tell him I wished I'd taken up barrel racing so I could ride better.
I got laughed at by a homeless guy in a Daniel Boone hat. I have no clue what this means for my day
I'm at a bar. It's body paint Wednesday. All of the waitresses are topless. Help me
once he tried to wake me up from my hangover nap to have sex, that's when things went downhill. he had to go.
he had hair everywhere except his balls
You're having marijuana delivered to you. You're buying drugs and you aren't even leaving the house. I'm sure he'll be surprised if you're NOT wearing a bathrobe.
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