How long do you think herpes can live on chapstick?
I have way too many pictures of poop on my phone
buying booze in bulk is always a bad idea. i wish there was some direct deposit-like system
You kept telling that ginger girl, "it's not your fault, it's not your fault, it's not your fault."
I got a bikini wax for the first time today and I think I now understand feminism.
you have no chance. her best friend is a human abstinence poster.
I head back to the dorms in less than a week I'm not ready to see my roomate naked that much again.
Remember that mom/daughter stripper team? Well i just met the ex husband/father in AA. WOW!!!! WOW....
AND I JUST BURNT MY BACON. WTF MONDAY. SCREW YOU TOO
Did I send you a naked snap the other day with a fat blunt in my mouth with the caption "$1200 bitches!" ?
I am eating a king sized snickers in the strip club. Good morning.
At this point it's more of an experiment to see how much actual bush growth is possible. See, being single can be both educational and surprisingly comfy!
Looks like I'm not in the Ashly Madison files. But my wife is.
I'm really going to need you to stop yelling Campari.
you hit your head on the sneeze guard and passed out at Pizza Hut they called the police
Randomize
