Apparently at one point I was wearing my sweatshirt backwards like it was normal and then I threw up into the hood. Never drinking again.
I am at a striph cluv. They are ovealls everywhere. I have hot rock botto.
im contemplating emailing my dad and telling him how worthless i am and how sorry i am that he pays for my life...aka my bar tabs.
They are pre-gaming a trip to congress...not sure how politically correct the group is.
my roommate just showed up covered in dirt, drunk....with a whole ice cream cake that says "it's a girl".
I punched some guy in the face for being an asshole then later I went to say sorry and give him a hug and he started making out with me. How was your new years?
If you got tons of KY ads on HuluPlus, it's because I hit "relevant" every time.
Emoji's do wonders when you actually have nothing at all to say..
I drank enough to tranq a steed. You really missed out
Sent him a snap chat of him eating me out so he can relive the moment.
The only way he could ever pleasure me is if he lit himself on fire and let me watch
They have beer where we have blood.
the last thing I remember is taking a pull of ever clear and chasing it with vodka
I just hooked up with the German exchange student who doesn't speak English. And you said I have no talent.
Give me the sexing that I truly desire and I will reveal to you the mysterious location of the PBR's
Randomize
