hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.
I swear if she hugs me I'm going to bleach my body
I'm worried someone is gonna take a black light to my work computer. But the connection is faster here.
It's been five and a half years since she and my brother stopped dating. I feel like that's a long enough grace period. Going for it.
i just found out the cashier has a picture of my junk in her phone.
The girl I hooked up with in exchange for Ramen freshmen year is living with the girl I currently wish to bang.
Try oodles of noodles this time.
When hitting a Woodchuck bottle with a machete, glass will fly back and cut your face.
I hope you did not try this.
I feel like our low point of the night was when we had to start chasing with ice cubes and wheat thins.
somehow I feel like "adventures with cocaine and molly" wouldn't be an appropriate "How I Spent My Spring Break" essay topic.
why am i naked
you took off your clothes at the party and some guy took them home
I just handed a girl a slice of pizza and she handed me her number. Is this how Vegas hookups normally begin?
I'M MAKING HIKING PLANS WITH THE GIRL WHO IS DATING MY EX, THAT IS PERSONAL FUCKING GROWTH
He sent me a slow motion video of him jerking off...it was so long (the video not his dick) even I felt awkward watching it alone
We had sex on his grandparents floor... the taxidermy deer was staring at me the whole time!
His beard looks like it smells like beer, cocaine and old pussy juice
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