Tell him ill love him long time
I'll assure him of it
i think my tv is drunk
Damn. That makes sense
I know im like the sherlok holmes of sexual problems
So it turns out the white chocolate in the bathroom is actually soap
he just told me his nickname was "nickexplodeon"
does that mean he doesn't last long?
i knew she was high when she broke up the cookies into her glass of milk and ate it like cereal
I'm not a creep or anything, just a lost soul looking for a good lay
I cleaned out the fridge, had to pound the brews. I am going to be wrecked for my final at 1
I dont know what we smoked last night but I woke up and found out I started writing a book called White Trash Princess. Its the best thing Ive ever read
Jk. Anyone who everbeers with me is my type.
Just bought weed from the ice cream man. The kid in front of me got a tootie fruitie.
that's the first time I've heard "shenanigans" and "apocalypse" in the same sentence
You kept hiding under tables and grabbing people's legs and shouting SHARK ATTACK.
HOCKEY BUTTS AND BASEBALL BUTTS HONESTLY DO SOMETHING TO ME
Just broke into the basement of my house via my american red cross blood donor card. I officially save lives
Randomize
