i just borrowed 5 dollars from my eight year old sister. i'm at a new low
he wrote Vegans should suck on cow dick on her wall with permanent marker. thats how he got the black eye
My birth control alarm gets more depressing every night.
she just gave her compliments to the chief, at dennys
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She had her laptop open and there was microsoft word opend and all was written was "no italianoo"
I just walked by a party bus on my way to study. God hates me.
It was huge And he was twirling it around. Im telling you, beautiful wonderpenis
And nobody saved him?? That chick had like three teeth TOPS
dude, I convinced you I was your conscience for like 15 minutes last night. you weren't just "a little high"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How do I cancel buying spotify premium for two homeless people?
My soul is telling me that I need to take this exam naked.
Weirdest drunk sex ever. His sweat dripped into my eyeball and then he looked down and asked me why I was crying. I went with it.
Currently watching high school football on ESPN. Drink every time they say 'this kid's got potential' or 'look at this kid go' or 'atta kid' We're done for..
Can we climb Your roof?
No bitch its 2am go home.
Did you hear about the guy wearing a spiderman mask running around naked with a bottle of patron?
Yeah.
I was spiderman.
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