Rule #1. Nothing comes between you and fantasy sports. Not even a hot chick willing to give you a blow job
They threw me out of the bar because I was arguing business ethics with the owner of th bar
she told me her two favorite things were grocery stores and dick.
yeah come on over we're just pre gaming for the grocery store
I enjoyed our heart to heart in the trunk on the way to the stripclub
Its a Guy he gets weed for. I'm kinda confused as to why there are going to even be tuxedos involved at all.
The other. Cat spoke to me and left. This shit is laced
The first cat might save me but they are taking out masks
In the sauna. Drunk. When I close my eyes I think I'm a dog. Is that wrong?
Did you mean to cry when you finished last night? Or were you just that drunk?
Last thing I remember was wondering why there was a mirror on the wall behind the urinal and then realizing I was pissing in the sink.
you passed out while setting up your phones timer to time how long it would take before you to passed out.
I just want to lay in a bed of egg mcmuffins and cry
Condoms and Ice Cream, that's all we need.
Maybe because you rubbed my clit while we were making churros
Its like Gods punishment for wanting to party
Randomize
