i just realized that we are the poor version of bethenny and jill from real housewives... and I'm jill. this is a 6.5 on the depressing scale
at least we're not in new jersey
I'm officially "accidentally set myself on fire" drunk
I'll be heading downtown with donuts and a lawn chair at 9am to go Halloween Walk o' Shame spotting.
and the award for most disgusting thing ever done on my couch now officially goes to you! Congratulations, you won the couch...I can't even look at it anymore.
Housing came buy and confiscated our shopping cart :(
At least I tried to be smart when I brought the alarm clock into the bathroom just in case I fell asleep.
Slept in my car last night. It snowed. I peed on the street. Hello 29...
I thought it was a myth but I have just reached the age of sitting on my balls. Not a fan.
The only way I can describe this shit is male aloe vera plant in both looks and feel its standing in the toilet
Thanks for that....my girlfriend picked up my phone and saw that
My day in three words: secret purse cake
I have to remind myself to breathe. That hungover.
Stop jerking off to vines my recommended list on YouTube is getting weird.
I'm not gonna swipe right, he has better hair than me. Just no.
i feel as though me waking up and asking her if i went to the hospital was a sign that i was not okay
"keg stand!" on a roof abruptly turned into "call the medics"
Randomize
