just chased whiskey with a pickle. i definitely recommend it
Its like a 4.5 hour drive but there's drinking involved so I'm destined to go
you made your own hammock out of a towel and duct tape.
Having skype sex with him in the lounge at 1:45am...THIS IS WHAT HE DOES TO ME
I can count the number of hours she's been sober this weekend on one hand.
He completely dissapeared at the baseball game. We found him passed out at the hotel three hours later with souviner photos of himself at the top of the Sears Tower.
and he's drinking a bud lime in his profile pic meaning i can out drink him, meaning i would clearly be the alpha in our relationship
I'm pretty sure I told everyone in the bar I hadn't had sex in five months. And then I offered everyone calamari.
If I had to summarise my weekend I would do so using the words "horrifying romanian moonshine"
Omg. I have a story to tell you later about that girl that just crawled on stage
PS: I just woke up from my shower
You're a five foot adderall and caffeine fueled ball of sexual frustration and suppressed rage. It's only a matter of time before you snap. We're taking bets on when.
Dude. Cvs sells sex toys. And my discount works on them. Game on.
Why do you hate her?
She's dating the best penis that has ever entered my vagina.....
the only decorations on the Christmas tree were twinkle lights, condoms, and empty natty cans. I do love a classy holiday party
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