Bro, i just sang journey's "dont stop beleavin" at mcdonalds. and the guy was sooo impressed he gave us free food. God i love america
Please tell me nicole sent the picture of the ejaculating penis to you too, otherwise I'll feel really awkward
basically theres shrimp everywhere. splattered on the walls, in the carpet, its bad. ohh theyre never gonna get the smell out.
you were afraid hed set himself on fire so you dumped a box of baking soda on him
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You called me to pick you up from the bar at 9:00. When we drove over the speed bumps you put your hands in the air and pretended you were on a roller coaster.
There was a selfie of you in the dark pointing at the camera with a duck face. You sent it to my 60 year old mother with the caption "you behave"
when you're a senior and the freshman guy you wake up next to asks who you are, you DO NOT give him your real name.
We're not piercing ourselves today.
he only noticed i dyed my hair purple like halfway through sex and he looked really shocked and he just said "You look like Barney." as he came.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just sneezed glitter I JUST SNEEZED G LITTER I j u st SneeZED GLIT TER I DO NOT HAVE TIME FOR THIS AT ALL.
It makes me feel all patriotic & free... And borderline diabetic.
I have a few Facebook friends I only keep around for quality control purposes on Tinder
I just threw up in the bushes and my gardener started clapping...
Is it ok to bone a former patient who is also a client? Since it is two negatives does that cancel and become a positive?
I didn't have any lime for my chaser.. so after my shot I ate a handful of lime flavored chips. Didn't work so great.
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