Yeah, it wasn't as bad as I thought. I tried not to clench and things went pretty smoothly.
OMG THIS GUYS LICENSE PLATE IS GETTNHRWET
she made me cover her fishbowl with my shirt because she "didn't want to corrupt it."
my brother walked in while we were fucking, silently took my bong from my closet, saluted us and walked out.
I couldnt bring myself to steal alcohol from my dead grandma
Only in this snowstorm did have I realized the lengths I'll go to to get laid.
Do any of you want to be on a three way call with me while this girl masturbates in 10 min? You can't talk
On an unrelated note, i found out who duct taped shoelaces to my face
I don't think I can look at him the same way anymore after he walked in my room wearing a short skirt with a boner.
I most definitely just found a video on my phone that I accidentally took... You can't see anything and all you can hear is me talking about how good your water was... And then I fed it to you... And used the word "eloquent" to describe it.
That BJ in the bathroom was definitely worth the $20 cover.
Son of a bitch took my liquid eyeliner
He made a toga out of my hot pink bed sheets and cracked an egg on his head. Then he proceeded to alphabetize our DVD collection, which was impressive because I'm 99% sure he couldn't have done that sober.
also, i'm not sure if i'm proud to say this but our regional manager's hot fiance was grinding on me at the reception while he stood and watched.
i suppose that explains why he told me he plans on promoting you this Friday.
not only did he puke in his mouth and hold it.. He also sneezed while doing this
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