i have a feeling tonight will end in rehab
Is your delayed response due to the massive amount of judging going on?
I'm going to show my kids 2 girls 1 cup just to scare them away from porn
Is there a nice way to say "I like you, but I hate your dick?"
maybe we can find two twins tonight and bang them together and then my life is complete
I'm listening to bach and watching porn,is that a sign of depression?
Quite the contrary. Sophistication.
Highlight of the night was you walking into the men's room yelling "My husband is diabetic" and crawling under the stall to yell at me.
I walking on her passed out on her bed, clutching a burrito and the walking dead dvd on replay.
Ugh I need to clean my floors/walls/ I actually don't understand why boys get drunk and pee on things
Next time one of us has a party everybody has to wear a diaper. But actually you just need a shit ton of disinfectant wipes and maybe a hazmat suit.
YOU ARE TAKING ADVANTAGE OF MY INEBRIATED STATE
YOU ARE DRUNK AND USED AND SPELLED THE WORD "INEBRIATED" CORRECTLY. I AM TAKING ADVANTAGE OF NOTHING.
I CAN'T HELP THAT I'M MULTITALENTED YA FUCKER
One day this summer I just wanna get blown under the hot sun all day.
Deal. Roof-top 69 on Saturday, July 20th. I've got it in my calendar.
I'm turning twenty & the only honorable way to exit my teens is by slapping the fuck outta the bag. You better be in.
I just gave an orange Froot Loop the finger for falling on the floor instead of my mouth when I was pouring a mini box of cereal into my face.
there is a smiley face on my leg painted in blood
I'm pretty sure that's yours.
Taking a shot every time the Russian in COD says vodka... BEST drinking game ever.
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