That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
hey i know this is weird but does alcohol affect pregnancy tests?
i'd fuck the guy who invented dead baby jokes.
Alcoholism comes in two forms... Us.
Ice cream after masturbating>masturbating any other time
Fuck you come back. The old guy next to me is complementing me on my great choice of ring fingers,
That stripper was not happy when I tried putting a dollar in her court mandated ankle bracket/tracking device
I think I'll bring the beer we scavenged from that other party. What goes around comes around, especially when it's Corona because that shit is not staying in my fridge
Are you up yet? I really want to know if i tried sleeping in a field... i have the vaguest memory of trying to
Waiting to interview and found a beer in my purse from last night
I can't believe I ever hated her sister or friends. They got her some sexy sexy ass lingerie for the honeymoon. I think I love them bitches
In case you're wondering what eggs stolen from an elementary school's chicken coop taste like, delicious. Delicious is what they taste like.
the moment when you open a dick pic with your mom in the car... On your moms phone... Of your dad... Scarred for life
Hold on I'll be right there, I can't find my arm.
I need you to know I’m weirdly very sexually attracted to Charlie Puth now
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