If I would have known that wiping my dick on her pillow would have caused her to leave........
i justawanted to let you know that illi aalways be thwew for ui and o qill waasag youer dog whenebvet u wsnt
Drawing dicks in the frost on people's windshields is a rare joy I allow myself while walking to my 8 AM class.
Oh god. There is a bite mark in the bar of soap. Please tell me I was not that wasted.
I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
I was under the impression that I sent actual words. turns out it was a series of letters and question marks on a side note we still had sex
He was completely serious when he said my boobs were like "majestic white clouds."
I was passed out in a dog food bowl tor two hours. Just tapped my dinner beer. I love homecoming.
There's somethin not right about having to take the batteries out of your 27 year old boyfriends gameboy to use in your vibrator
some people spend their whole lives trying to find their soulmate. who knew mine was hiding in utah successfully balancing a pageant career and a coke habit.
It's funny when you can't take a fishing boat because you fucked the captains wife
I touched a dick in church today
That's when I realized I was probably naked in the wrong bed
I sprayed his whole room with my perfume and left lots of my hair on the bed. So now if he does bring her home, the bitch will know this territory is marked.
The covid immunization shot lady also sold me a mondo bag of really good pot.
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