why did i save someone in my phone as corn dildo?
i googled "where to have sex in disneyland." i found nothing.
Someone just proposed in Subway. Trying not to laugh.
Those are some awfully high standards for someone of your weight
Well, technically I had a shirt on, it was just around my waist.
ill give you a picture of me naked for $5. im desperate.
Does he not understand that naked slip and slide needs supervision after dark?!
Put cigar in mouth backwards. Plz remind to check for scar in morning, can't feel it now. Screwdrivers are like morphine.
Okay wait let me power puke and then we can go dancing
Im down. Even tho your nick name intimidates my vagina.
He autographed my vag. This fuck just got authentic.
omg this is getting ridiculous. nobody's vagina should ever be this neglected.
It's snowing in May and there was a law school party at the strip club. The end is near.
My boobs are hoarders, they steal food and hide it. Greedy bitches.
Is constant horniness a medical condition? Because a husband, a boyfriend and an office side piece should be enough penis for one girl - but they’re not :-(
Randomize
