And surprisingly enough iPhone does not have an app for Russian mail order brides.
Between cock and motorcycle I'm glad I don't have to sit at work tomorrow
your dad made us margaritas and breakfast on the morning. I think it's safe to say he relives his glory days through us
Seriously. There are at least 10 other people drinking at the bar with me at 10:40. Im justifying it with the fact that I've been up since 5am.
Went to the wedding reception, and he left with ALL of the brides maids phone numbers. I don't know how he does it either.
Wow, nothing is more special than changing the channel and seeing the guy who groped you on Saturday night...
Way to ruin everything
I am drinking jager with a cat, your argument is invalid
Its not like i paid for sex. She was stuck there, we simply exchanged rides.
So how was your new years? Did u ride a horse at 3am in zero degree weather? Because I sure did
Showing up to Easter hungover, late, and covered in black an blues from pole dancing. Daughter of the year.
Vodka and tater tots have managed to satisfy me more than most of the guys I've slept with.
How'd the date with the redheaded dentist go?
She didn't like my gingervitis joke
Eat your greens and take your tequila shots
Take home message: SPERM IS EVIL AND SHOULD NEVER EVER EVER BE ALLOWED UP ONE'S NOSE.
Remind me to tell you about how I hit a tree with my car last night.
I'll be glad to.
Randomize
