i can't wait to kiss dudes with my vampire teeth in.
do you realize that she was the awkward lesbian in high school and now bangs more girls than probably both of us combined?!
Either way, he made a blog for his cat.
We left live chickens on the basement slip n slide. Good luck finding your car keys
Post-sex nachos deserve a song.
Most men with as many freckles as you aren't vagina magnets. You are an exception to your kind.
You are a special snowflake. A special snowflake I wouldn't mind rough sex with
So you're saying you don't want to be with her anymore because she likes sex to much and is just to hot?
Well when you say it that way it makes me sound like an idiot.
You are an idiot.
I'm making mistakes. Coming up with girl now
I hate me. That girl was hiiiiideous.
She's passed out with a slice of pizza between her boobs should I just eat it and leave
She knew the head wasn't all that so she gave me her taco. I'm will in to give her a second chance.
DUDE!!!!! THERE IS A MIDGET HANDING OUT RICE KRISPIE TREATS!!!!!! WHERE ARE YOU WHEN THE COOL SHIT GOES DOWN???????
The only thing i ask you for is vegan food and sex.
I JUST WANT TO HAVE AWKWARD SEXUAL EXPERIENCES WITH HIM.
The neighborhood cougar just purred at me while I was doing yard work. I’m terrified and tumescent
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