So his roomate was eating breakfast when I was sneaking out. He's the guy I took home from jessicas wedding. I ended up eating coco puffs with him
Just another sign I need to get out of this town
God. I'm so broke I don't even have a dollar to snort my adderall through.
saw you walking with that piece of shit
and that piece of shit just read that
Taking a shot for every status related to the patriots losing. Hello hospital.
Also, I found out tonight a major plus for being female is you can accidentally call the hot bartender sweet tits and she won't get mad.
I'd like to bring you 40 virgins and treasure chests of gold to make you feel better
I woke up naked under desk at her apt once during my freshman year. I should have known that friendship was of a different breed...
I can't wait to see you again...not a euphemism, just really looking forward to seeing you. Wanting to fuck you as often as possible just seems implied at this point.
I'm not the one who gave a guy that lives next door to my grandmother a blowjob in a pub bathroom in Ireland, you have no room to judge.
Jäger goes great with personal crises and receding morals...
Stories. There's stories.
MEGHAN YOU'VE BEEN THERE FOR 20 MINUTES
The last time the Patriots won the Super Bowl I lost my virginity. I can only imagine what'll happen if they win this year.
I was having a dream that I was swimming in a pool filled with melted chocolate but woke up to find I had poured chocolate milk all over my body
she told me id be a great addition to their lesbian community and shes giving me sex eyes from across the room. come get me NOW
I came home and drank a bottle of wine in the bathtub. I have AMAZING coping skills!!
Randomize
