You flung your panties at that guy you liked with an accuracy that I have never seen before.
When my girlfriend drinks sangria it's like winning the vagina lottery
I twisted my ankle last night doing a super high five with 3 inch heels on.
I am totally the chick from Intervention who barfs up wine and then re-eats it.
No stds, not pregs, and lost two pounds. I'd call that a successful two years of grad school.
I'm gonna sleep with her just to prove to my roomate that shes a slut and he's wasting his time
Is waterboarding an exceptable way of getting sober?
Yes, I did know where her mouth had been, but frankly I think it was a lesson you needed to learn.
planned ethnic drinking holidays while bored at work thru next may. I don't suppose you have any scots or russian in you?
Well apparently I'm no fun since I won't have a threesome with him and my mother.
You told my mom you were going to "Raw Dawg some randoms." That Drunk.
Dad just showed up on someone else's golf cart, filled an ice chest with booze and left while yelling "SHINANIGANS!!!!" this is going no where fast.
That dog was the best thing i ever touched
She tried to subtly measure me, but I noticed. She told me I barely made the cut otherwise there would have been just a handshake as a parting gift.
apparently ive been in a long term relationship for the past 1 1/2 years w/ out knowing
Randomize
