I will also inform you that stairs change when you change a house. Those hurt.
U know u have sex too much when u have lube in ur rolliball on ur blackberry
I bought 2 40s with winning lottery tickets and they paid me $.03. 'Merica
It's been a year of occasional hook ups....this was bound to happen sometime even with your jank ovary schedule.
I do have a life. It just consists of making scarves and chesse straws now
There was booze on his face and I wanted it. I'm not sorry.
When I'm famous, she'll look at her kids and go "I saw her buttcheeks beefore she was famous. I'm truly blessed."
So we came to a decision, you need to fuck your hot roommate and send us pictures. We voted, so don't hate the democracy this great country stands for
btw, whatever u do, dont try and take that towel away from her..i tried, it got ugly..she said some things im sure she regrets.
it wasn't a total waste of time; I mean how often do you get to play scotch pong?
.....fair enough
Fyi, shaking your genitals at me doesn't count as "trying to have sex".
I've now fucked in every motel room in this small town.
FOUND MY PANTIES COMINY JOME
& he told me that I give the best head ever.. like can I get that on a medal?
If body pillows had a built in vibrator attached I would literally never need a boyfriend again
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