Hahahhahaha! Oooh get it! Ugh I am so dead but if I go to the lib whuich I will hopefully b havung sex instead, ill hit u up
There's a girl in my class named "La-a" pronouced "Luh Dash uh" I hate everyone
don't leave me alone with all the disney princess sluts
please explain to me why there is a shopping cart in my living room.
I know it is almost summer when the students in my night class start showing up drunk.
Just thought you should know in my puerto rico drunkenness yesterday I signed my dogs name on the bar tab. cruise = success
He;s fine. He just kept saying "hurricane Gordon is coming to shore" and flexed his muscles a lot.
You high fived me for banging your sister but lock me outta house bc I ate your pumpkin pie? Priorities bro
You're making her cookies in enchange for knitting lessons. You will die a virgin.
Sometimes crazy just comes naturally. I don't need booze to say that on occasion I feel the need to rip off my asshole and throw it against the fridge to see if it sticks.
What if everything solid was made of oreos and everything liquid was wine
I just got chills
He was peeing on the back wall of a building. He would have been okay if the building hadn't been a police station.
like I licked Molly off a boys palm last night at a bar I think its ok to eat chicken once a week
And also ice skating can blow me. Goodnight, love you!
Question: the touchscreen on my phone randomly quit working, do you think this could be a latent reaction from me peeing on my phone last weekend?
Randomize
