Man, ugly runs in her family
yeah, big time
theres no point in washing my sheets anymore. its always going to be a fine layer of booze and semen.
totally got the gold medal for the best fence jump when the cops came.
my Econ professor just passed around his phone for us to take a pic of ourselves so he could learn our names. I am currently looking him up on my sex offenders app.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
they're mlb prospects.. of course i'm gonna bang one of them.
Imagine a baby lion feeding on an injured gazelle and it tasting fresh blood for the first time. That's me and this breakfast sammich
Just scrubbed my teeth for a good twenty minutes. Herpes is afraid of toothpaste, right?
puking in a sink with a garbage disposal Fucking. Rules. It's like you're punishing your puke when you're done.
Oh god. I asked to "play his sexaphone" which I though was a super sex way to say "let me blow you". He fucking walked home at 4:30am
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We celebrated International Women's Day by spending $700 and taking our tops off at the strip club
The boys offered to pay but we went halfs because we're feminists
today i was walking through gramercy with a dress bag from David's Bridal and a bag of McDonald's. No guy would make eye contact with me as I scarfed down my fries. I think I was mankind's walking night terror.
oh so have I but I'd still suck a dick or 20 in the name of freedom.
Do exhausted, barely concealed hand jobs count as joining the mile high club?
It's okay to admit that you're into redheads.
God... We're terrible. I'm so proud of us.
I know! It makes me feel all warm inside. Or maybe that's just me getting closer to hell.
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