i think the next time he gets me off i'm going to scream bangarang
ru fi oooo
there's a taquito in the driveway. If it's not yours I'm going to eat it.
I feel like the only solution to this is to get naked and lay in the shower for a hour then see what my penis wants to do.
Is it rude if I ask the current tenets of our future apartment if I can come and blackout for a night? I want stupendously drunk me to get a feel for the place so he's comfortable when we move in.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You have not lived until you've seen your mother stumble into the house with one shoe on mumbling incoherently about tequila cupcakes.
Are you around on Saturday? Feeling a trip over
Wet with either fear or sexual excitement
I think a mixture of both is appropriate
I kind of learned that hotels are unnecessary. Boys will just take you home, but that's tough with a group. I believe in us, though.
FULL ON LADY WOOD. YOU CAN SEE THE VEIN
PA to anyone at the party last night and wondering where your pants are: they are in my backyard.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You was so high that you insisted that you heard someone whistle, then you insisted they was trapped in the wall!
Here's to not getting arrested this year on thanksgiving again. Cheers bitches!
I'm really sorry I hooked up with your student on the dance floor..
You were trying to be sexy by spraying your contact solution on your chest and telling me to lick it off
Whatever he got a sick blow job and his high school fantasy was fulfilled
And that's what dreams are made of
*hilary duff crying in the background*
he's fucking insane. he's worse than me. is that even possible? I'm only with him because his dick is huge. I need Jesus.
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