plz talk dirty to me
There's this guy beside me dancing with this girl with no panties on. When I looked at him he said he's babysitting his bestfriend's girlfriend since he can't come out.
What a good friend
Answer the phone when I call you in a second. Just got pulled over for getting road head, going to secretly put you on speaker phone, this should be good
his penis was like watching paranormal activity your very hyped up to see it but you think it might be very scary and in the end you didnt really see anything at all
i just made a girl do the walk of shame. as a bumblebee. i love halloween.
i was trying to find the best way to say come over and have sex, without saying it.
It's not every day you get to see a girl fuck herself with a pickle.
i dont even mind you always shaving my pubes when i pass out, i'm starting to find it liberating.
yeah they are definitely having sex in that car. joe just yelled through the window telling them to do the "titanic hand print thing"
He said female orgasms are a myth and refuses to even try to give me one.
Just found a pic on my phone of you on squatting on the hood of a police car about to take a dump. Care to explain what happened last night?
I'd help you out but I got Bacardi and Tequila poured down my snorkel last night and I'm still drunk
The shrooms have turned on carrie. Change of plans. We're getting stoned and finding bacon.
So you called me the queen of nudes yesterday and I'm still not sure how I feel about it
The coke machine at work is laughing at me. Literally. I just heard laughter from the coke machine
Randomize
