I wanna bring you to show and tell
Just washed my feet between classes in the bathroom...Four girls totally judged me...
she peed on how many people?
She just told me she's too full for a reach-around. Sad.
This does no justice to the amount of paint I'm covered in or the amount of balls I'm tripping.
another part of my inner child died when i emptied my crayon bank for dollar beer night.
Trying to figure out when's a good time to take acid and not tell anyone and see how long it takes people to notice
we're stoned watching those roller coaster simulators w our hands up screaming on our couch
So, your gf couldn't walk up the stairs without your help, but she could knit you a scarf?
I think the fact that the scarf was made out of dental floss should be taken into account.
Repeat. Dildo on the ceiling, confiscated potato shooter, and bottle of yegger. Repeat. Ceiling dildo and yegger.
I think a girl on my floor is watching zombie porn. There is literally no other description for the noise coming from her room.
I ran into a hotel and told the doorman he was doing a great job. That was before you cried on my jacket.
You know you're doing well in life when weed is considered to improve your job performance
Stop getting drunk and running away. I can'tell chase you. Iim in heels and have big boobs. Running is a bad idea for me.
You know you're more responsible when you turn down your bed and make a clear path to it before you go out..
Randomize
