shes hot in the i'd deny it if anyone asked kinda way
I've come to realize that after waking up this morning for work no one wins in bar dice.
I've decided, even as much fun as it sounds, I don't care for his sodomy box.
he needs a life. he was like frothing at the mouth to cockblock you
You looked like my 4th grade science fair volcano project when you burped. Told you chugging a 40 would be awesome.
Keep your head up. His game is good, and you should be honoured to be a notch on his wall. If it makes you feel better, if it wasn't you, it was going to be me.
I really just want to stuff him in my purse, take him home, feed him pudding or applesauce and brush his hair. That's not creepy, right?
I've been at work 30 min broke a paper towel holder a chair set a box on fire and fell down twice. Hungover Brian just reached a new level
Is tonight a drink a little and reminisce kinda night, or a drink everything and pray kinda night?
I JUST WANT TO HAVE MILDLY SOCIALLY ACCEPTABLE SEX WITH HIM AND CALL HIM CUPCAKE.
i will not be out-irished. not this night. if i don't wake up tomorrow handcuffed to a hospital bed, i have failed my ancestors.
Are u alive? If u are, you deserve an award.
Just wanted to share my unfortunate vagina news in the hopes that it would make your vagina feel better about itself.
Vodka Red Bull is like your spinach if you were Popeye
But on a side note, how the fuck do you "accidentally " get peed on
Randomize
