that girl last night was a 15
wait she was 15?
no like black jack not sure if you should hit it
they thought it would be fun to get out their yearbook and see who hooked up with the most guys..I won...I don't even go to the same school
Note to self: when drunk try to remember that ctrl, alt and dance doesnt exist on a keyboard.
Romer got arrested for getting in a bar fight with a bus boy because he was trying to steal a keg, had it all the way to the car
Its time to go balls to the wall to get any good D during these last few weeks of college.
That girl that gave me a blowjob, I think I fired her last year.
I just shotgunned a beer alone in the bathroom...what do you expect from me
Looking forward to meeting the person naked and passed out at my kitchen table.
Next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
If the ex isent in town and im crying under a table somewhere because of it can we go to a drag show or something
I decided to have a date tonight. Back on horse I go. Or aiming to be on a horse cock one day. You know. However that metaphor goes.
Good news. His dicks gotten wayy bigger since high school. I love Thanksgiving break.
We got stoned and took selfies with the most perfect lawn
It's been so long since I had sex I might propose to the next girl who will sleep with me.
You mentioned his name and i threw up a little.
Randomize
