i effing cant stand that stupid soul the new way to roll hamster commercial. everyone im with is laughing and now hate them all.
wait.. the condom broke. ehh whatever i think im already 2 months pregnant
South Carolina's governor once cited "moral legitimacy" when he was a congressman voting for President Bill Clinton's impeachment. Karma is a bitch.
this dieting is killing me...just started drooling watching a dog food commercial
McDonalds has hash browns for only a quarter!....how many u want?
All of them
Honestly, where the fuck is osama bin laden?
I found it funny that her boobs actually kinda felt like a bag of sand. the 40 year old virgin should feel better about himself.
yeah you're probably right.. i should stop equating love with getting naked on a webcam for him.
We all just did coke and we're coloring so if you're sober its pointless for you to come over here
does doing it on an automatic sink count as shower sex?
I cried over the lack of milkshakes I've consumed in the last month
i had a flashback to you roaring like a dying tiger and then throwing your wallet (maybe?) at the cat in the living room and saying "you're the only adult that lives here take all my money"
So if he doesn't show up do we eat his birthday cake? Because I'm stoned and wrestling is on. What's the proper protocol
Had a dick customer and the words "eat my ass" slipped out. He proceeded to lick his lips and say present it. I think it's time I quit.
She tied me to the bed and did lines off my chest before sex. I’m going to put that on my bucket list just so I can cross it off
Randomize