I just am on my way home.. i had 3 and one startd crying and puking.. so they went home. one bitch fuckin ruined it for evryone.. u playin cards?
We succumbed to passion, and then he had to go meet his girlfriend. End of story.
He about cried when I ordered pizza online. He said it was a miracle.
She made a list of the things each of us had done wrong and assigned a point system. Guess who came out the loser?
So I used the "I've never cummed from a BJ before" line last night.
And that worked?
9 for 9! Not only does it give them a goal but they have a sense of accomplishment afterwards.
I dont care how high you are, meat and sprinkles dont mix dude
The swelling on my elbow and tongue means I may have cockblocked myself.
Stole every fake plant from the lobby and placed it in front of you're apartment door, Enjoy!
He can spot Burberry from half a bar away. He's not into vag
there is vodka in my soul right now. The vapor is coming out my nose.
We fucked through the entire Destiny's Child album, it was a beautiful thing.
I straight up told your dad I've slept with a majority of your family
All I remember about last st pattys day was I was in a bathtub with full bubbles, fully clothed, drinking out of a flamingo lawn ornament that someone cut a hole in.
I don't think meeting his drug dealers counts as a relationship landmark.
That's too much drama for once a month dick... that's in-house dick drama only
Randomize
