Midgets have it so easy. They have so much less leg area to shave.
Im interpreting your silence as a silent plea for me to come wake you up. See you soon.
i was considerably less excited after they told me my present didnt have a penis
"guaranteed dick" "anywhere - her room, my room, trees, couch"
Sorry that was quotes about you from the grad student.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You are the tramp this city needs, but not the one it deserves.
Okay, I just got to our real hotel and the YMCA may have been a better choice. A man w/ no shirt on
Who knew I could feel anymore shameful at the bar than i usually do...I think my bartender recognizes me from the walk of shame out of his house after i hooked up with his son yesterday
Nothing says "single girl" quite like Pinot Grigio and canned ravioli at 11:30 pm....
After tacos, we're chasing women.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sooooooo this guy just asked me if I'd be interested in a threesome... I'm considering bc I would get to hang out with his dog afterwards.
My neighbour just came round to ask why we posted a spatula through his door at 3am. What do I tell him??
Just learned that the cute guy I've been flirting with at the beach this whole time is actually an inmate working in the community instead of being in prison.. My life is unreal
Everything is scary i hate being an adult i hate responsibility tell me a dick joke
But I think I successfully seduced her with my alias.
Bro I rebuilt the dungeon in animal crossing visit me
Broooo
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