he only lasted three minutes, so to spite him i stayed the night and slept in.
Update: Discussing lingerie with my father. He likes sheer black things. Not into the colorful stuff I wear.
He's married, a coworker, and a smoker. not sure which personal rule broken i'm most ashamed of...
he matches the description of mystery hookup #2, 4, and 7
I slept with him to see his dog one last time
I really have to stop waking up in hot tubs on Friday mornings.
i saw the poster for your lost tequila... what a shame
Well I think it's fate. Considering march is my fave month because it's my birthday and st. Patrick's day. And his name is Patrick. I'm sleeping with him all through march. No question.
There are 27 signatures on my ass. What the hell happened last night?
Every time someone made a cup you congratulated them by letting them sign your ass.
Dude, he's legal now. You could not pry me from his dick with the jaws of life.
Is he gonna be my crazy ex? Cause we weren't even together for as long as my weeklong bicurious lesbian relationship.
its not like i called off work either time for the purpose of tripping, it was more like well, i have nothing to do now today, there is acid and im only human.. but twice
I'm like an air traffic controller of women. It's a very similar job. Well spaced and gentle landings are good. When they meet, it's bad. Explosions bad. Dying screaming burning children bad.
My legacy here is being that tiny blonde girl that threw someone down and shouted "Fuck your face, I'm Dee Dee Ramone."
You threw away your W2 to make more room in your purse for liquor.
Randomize
