Yeah and Nick is shooting his loaded 9mm in his backyard.
If we keep treating our bodies like amusement parks we have another 10 years left at best.
I KNOW you don't honestly think you can pay me back in lotto tickets.
You broke a window with your face. I don't think the landlord will be as impressed as we were.
Now there's vomit covered trash all over the front lawn. I feel accomplished
Dude... Hand job in the lake... It was as weird as it sounds.
Last time we were that stoned we made a "everything you can fit in the blender" shake. Didn't end well..
Ok everyone, the frat server is slow because of the 11 TB of porn on there. Either clean out your partition by Sunday or it will be erased. Thanks for your help.
I faked an orgasm during phone sex last night. This relationship is starting to become real.
She failed the Charleston discretion test, although puking in her armpit was very innovative.
where will you be at 9:30 tonight?
piledriving you in your roommate's bed?
Nothing like the judgmental looks you get in the bathroom when you still have last night's glowsticks on
he just left the suite without pants on wrapped in Christmas lights
The wedding is over. Operation sleep with my step-sister has officially begun
I feel like I'm in a astronaut outfit like I'm a spaceman & I'm just floating around cause that's all you do in space is float and I'm floating to be in detail
Houston we have a problem
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