escape the fate? dumbest band name ever. how about escape the fart. now that is a show i would go see!
went out last night and woke up on the bathroom floor again, thinking about just moving my bed in there.
Its like the long john silvers of colleges, I wouldnt even go there to use the bathroom
dude, she masturbates with a ken doll.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sarah Palin is going to have a show on the discovery channel...Can I get a moment of silence for knowledge?
chinese tourists just took a picture of me....im pretty sure i heard the bus drive say something about shame.
Weed smoke burps in the boss's face. Job security.
Her idea of kinky involved a tazer
wtf?
I'm going back tonight
Getting drunk and throwing things at people isnt the same with you not here. Remember when you dislocated my elbow and then popped it back in in one motion?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was about to attempt a citizen's arrest on my RA
okay the fridge is completely filled only with alcohol. Not even exaggerating. There is no food.
Sometimes I wonder if we're going to make it to 40.
You were carrying a 6 ft lamp that we stole on your back yelling "OHANA MEANS FAMILY AND FAMILY MEANS NOBODY GETS LEFT BEHIND"
For new year's, we should just keep our resolution simple and keep accomplishing burpees in heels.... while drunk.
Did I honestly think it was a good idea to wear my pink robe out in public at 2 in the morning ?
You started singing Baby Shark, screamed you have no idea how it goes, then somehow turned the beat into Bohemian Rhapsody
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