I just showed my tits to my brother on chatroulette. Could my life get any worse?
I've made out with men from every corner of the globe. Sex-wise, I've almost conquered europe. Take that napoleon
The only way I can describe the noise he makes when he has an orgasm: dying walrus.
Just did the walk of shame in front of his dad while I was wearing his gym shorts and my heels from graduation last night. Keep it classy '12
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just gonna show up naked this time. that way i dont have to worry about finding my clothes tomorrow
him crossdressing on the weekends is awkward but not a deal breaker for me.
damnit. I just found my cousin on tinder.
Hey sorry for calling you so much last night. I mixed your number with the pizza guys, and he was running late
I can't wait to shower all this regret off of me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Remember that guy I fucked last month? Well I'm watching his dog this weekend while he's in the Bahamas with his girlfriend. What is my life
i think if a sober person was watching us they would have not thought we were witty
you'll kiss me after i give you a blowjob but you wont kiss me after I eat apple sauce? am I the only one who sees something wrong with this?
He kept apologizing that the nerve damage makes him take a while to finish. Meanwhile he gave me 3 orgasms and a leg cramp
Only you could benefit from a reckless driver
I got kicked out of the E.R. for saying "balls".
What's the point of having a gay best friend if he doesn't play with your titties?
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