Just passed a sign for an "adult food and fuel superstore". Wtf does that even mean?
im not sure but a few things come to mind which just makes me giggle
Guys should not giggle. Ever.
Just got new surround sound speakers for my computer... I feel like I'm actually IN the porn now.
sounds like you fell off the wagon.
fuck falling off. at this point, the wagon is a dot on the horizon.
why can't I meet attractive men at the places I like to hang out? like books a million. or the liquor store.
dude there's a blind guy on the trail using his service dog to hit on girls.
....she made me stop for like 3 minutes so she could talk to her cat....
And I was like "take off the damn flower crown, we're about to have sex not post an indie picture on tumblr"
why not an indie porn pic then
It was like we had a conversation with our eyes.
Was it a good conversation?
It was an awkward, sexual conversation.
Just cried to my husband about how much I'm going to miss my boyfriend... Maybe marriage is going to work for me after all
Every little girl dreams of the day when she picks up her fuck buddy because he's drunk at the gay bar again.
See I would make a great girlfriend. My surprises are sex and burritos. What else do guys want
They said you went back in for 30 minutes and were walking with your arms out like an eagle soaring
The bride is so wasted, she fell into her cake.I wanna be on her level
I'm about to do something based solely on the fact that a fortune cookie told me to. This may not end well.
Any chance he has an open marriage? That penis shouldn’t be wasted on one woman. It should be shared with all womankind, or at least me. I’m too good at sex to be deprived a penis that large
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