we have to go try and show our tits so we can get ID-free drinks at applebees
Is it standard protocol to defriend someone after they give you chlamydia?
Having skype sex with him in the lounge at 1:45am...THIS IS WHAT HE DOES TO ME
It's not my fault. Someone keeps buying me tequila shots. Idk who. But every time I look down there's another. I think there's a conspiracy.
Kurt said to text you and encourage you to come out tonight. Encourage you with my rack.
So I'm thinking next semester you should be my own personal maid, nurse, masseuse and chef in exchange for free lodging, any food you can find, and unlimited access to my reproductive organs.
I told him he deserved someone better...then I told him he looked very fuck-able wearing nothing but sweat pants. We'll break up in the morning.
he congratulated me on my ability to grow long hair after pulling it to see if i had extensions
Im fairly sure two chicks roofied me last night. Suckers. I love free drugs.
But we only had three ninja turtles. So everyone that would ask us where Donatello was, we would say "what? He's gone? Shredder is at it again!"
He just asked me to be his girlfriend while having sex on his parents kitchen counter
New rule. If he's too busy to put the "H" in "what" then I'm too busy to put his D in me.
i got my period today. mid walk of shame and im wearing a shirt that says stay classy. my life is a joke.
I want to find him again. His Corona tank top and I were made for each other.
Being single again makes you realize how guys can go from licking your asshole one night to never texting you again
Randomize