Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
Just found a ramen cup in the stall and all of the showers running with no one in them. WHERE ARE YOU?
it's 10:36pm. Do you know where your penis should be?
And my cat won't make me food. She's a bitch
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I took in his dog. My exboyfriend still calls me for 2 things, blow jobs and animal rescue. I need to end this cycle
Look, I'm just saying... paying ur respects to the neighbors who had a death in the family with food u steal from the neighbors having the cookout may result in a negative karma situation.
The only way I can describe this shit is male aloe vera plant in both looks and feel its standing in the toilet
Thanks for that....my girlfriend picked up my phone and saw that
i found out she really is a mensa member
so she was the smartest passed out on the floor hair encrusted in vomit girl at the party
There's a guy here who is improvising his own shadow dance on a table against the wall, in case you're wondering how my night is going
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just wanted to say a big ole FUCK YOU for coming out to mom the day before I have to drive with her for 6 hours. Ass hat.
I just found out who gave her jelly shots. You owe me a new mattress.
Cool. I might be making a sickly but incredibly well dressed wine drunk appearance in a couple hours
Just cried because I'm out of oreos. This post-molly depression can go fuck itself.
You gave me the best orgasm of my life. I'm buying you a house
Eh, my puke tasted like lemonade, so not too bad
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