Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
If I see one more duchette wearing Ed Hardy, but not actually having a real tattoo. I swear Im gonna shank a bitch.
i was just skypeing her and i saw the vagisil medicated wipes in the corner of her room. i'll be breaking this off tomorrow
Chugged a beer while being walked to the bathroom by campus police to pour the beers out.
there is beer in every square inch of this apartment and he hasn't even lived in it for 24 hours. we're playing some game that involves slamming beer, beer pong and smacking people's cups out of their hands.
apparently it's a turnoff if you ask a guy why he thinks he needs to use magnums
would it be mean if I put better with the lights off on my sex playlist just for my hook up with him?
We need a shit load of segways right now
He got too drunk... he threw up ON the closed toilet.
It's a Jersey thing
Going to the ER, I'll explain later but apparently drunk me isn't allergic to peanut butter.
Can we both just take a day off just to have sex? Is that acceptable as an adult?
I'll accept that I'm a woo girl. Just not the drunk cowboy hat wearing bar mongering twat bag type
Just woke up with the taste of tequila, weed, and cigarettes in my mouth spooning a friend I haven't seen since college wearing one contact and one ankle sock. I hate myself.
You almost got us killed.
YOU’RE WELCOME FOR NAVIGATING YOU TO A ONCE IN A LIFETIME EXPERIENCE.
You where banging on the wall asking us where we hid the door...you then crawled under the deck thinking you'd be safe. I told you to eat the nachos before the party...I told you.....
Randomize
