i just dont know how to see an unattractive person as more than a friend
woke up in a shopping cart using a keystone box as a blanket. how was your night?
My dick has been asking about u. He said he didn't do anything wrong n I'm a dumbass
I don't think anyone could emotionally handle a numb vagina.
That's fun. I just masturbated and I swear my vagina creaked.
My parents just out drank me... I cant get back to college soon enough
He drunk dialed me at 2am asking if he could put a baby in me.
That was when I yelled "Wisconsin powers activate!" and took off sprinting across the ice
I have an important idea to tell you when I'm sober about a cat scratching my nose once and what it taught me. DONT LET ME FORGET.
I fell into the fireplace. That is a pretty good sign to stop drinking fireball
He shampooed and conditioned his pubes but can't manscape for shit.
i just sneezed the second i jizzed and it got in my eye. words can't describe how much i hate life right now.
I just woke up, its 6AM and i'm pretty sure the guy passed out next to me is 70% ugly...
I don't want too, lol. I'm currently awaiting my next period like its the second coming of christ
I think you know you’ve caught feelings when you’re asking a tinder boy his opinion about your current fuck buddy.
Randomize
